March 17th, 2009

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My all-time champeen mondegreen

So khaosworks has discovered Blip.fm. I've heard it mentioned quite a bit recently, and decided to click through to see what it was.

I still don't know -- what I saw and heard stopped me dead. The title, "Bei Mir Bist Du Schön," meant nothing to me. But it autoplayed.

Do you know how many DECADES I've been thinking the Andrews Sisters were inviting Mr. Shane to drink beer?!
  • Current Music
    Andrews Sisters, "Bei Mir Bist Du Schön"
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Expire in the Sky

Here's one of the stories; hat tips to madfilkentist, who first pointed me at the story, and to hitchhiker, who then pointed me to the (in hindsight, obvious) place to go with it. (And yes, I know mosquitoes aren't technically bugs. Call it artistic license.) (Oh, and this version makes clear little, if any, SDI tech was involved. So, more artistic license. Though a new version of "Do It Yourself" may be in order...)

EXPIRE IN THE SKY
Words: (c) 2009 Joseph Abbott
Music: "Fire in the Sky," Jordin Kare, bridge by Kristoph Klover

Prometheus, they say, brought God's fire down to man
And we've caught it — tamed it — trained it — to kill all the pests we can
Now we're going after 'skeeters just to zap them in the eye
Torn asunder 'cross the land, bugs expire in the sky

Well, they put us skunks to work back in 1981
"If you want to shoot down nukes," we said, "you'll need a bigger gun"
We could tell you if we did it, but then you'd have to die
But now we're working for a charity, shooting bugs down from the sky

I dreamed last night
Of a little boy's first bug bite
Swelled over me
Know all too well how itchy it could be
I want mosquitoes to fry
I'll pursue them till I die
Make them expire in the sky
Expire in the sky!

Now the future's up to us -- there's mosquitoes to be slain
As we turn our lasers skyward and watch bug bits fall like rain
Send the word to all bloodsuckers: Time for you to say goodbye
'Cause we're gonna clear the lot with a Zapper Turned on High
Not much longer till you die!
You'll expire in the sky!
Expire in the Sky!

Spoken: FOOLS! WE WILL DESTROY YOU ALL! -- Ask us how!