Me: Yes, as a matter of --
Body: 'Cause you slid down the steps and fell on your ass.
Me: Yes, I know --
Body: Just in case you'd forgotten.
Me: No, I hadn't --
Body: Because I haven't.
Me: Look, I didn't think it would be that icy. I was being careful.
Body: Obviously not careful enough. As evidenced by your sliding down the steps and falling on your ass.
Me: (sigh) Look -- here, have some hot tea and ibuprofen.
Body: Don't get the idea that bribery will work. (sip) Completely.
